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The Consolation Prize Workout

This morning, my totally kickass husband updated his status on Facebook like this:

That tremendously badass compliment is doubly-awesome when you know that at the time, I was in my pajamas (velour leopard print bottoms trimmed around the ankle with pink lace, XXL long-sleeved Social Distortion t-shirt with a bleach mark on the sleeve, black workout socks), lamely huffing and puffing through situps, squats, and pushups on the tumbling mat I keep in the corner of the Glamour Room.

Not exactly action hero stuff.

Especially when you consider that I’d been crying in the bathroom just a few minutes earlier. After hitting the snooze bar THREE times and bargaining with myself about whether or not I should go to the gym for so long, I’d run out of time for that to be a real possibility.

In desperation – and feeling like if I didn’t move my body I would lose my mind – I climbed out of bed (for the third time… yes, I went through the entire process of prying myself out of bed then diving back under the covers THREE times), plopped the mat on the floor, and started on my first set of squats before I could think about it any further.

5 rounds:
20 air squats
20 situps
10 pushups
no whining

Smudge tried to help me about halfway through. Surprisingly, her sniffing my elbow didn’t improve my pushups much. My last-ditch-effort-WOD took about 15 minutes, and honestly, it wasn’t my best contribution to the CrossFit canon, but I didn’t feel any worse after I’d done it than I did before. And I might have felt marginally better. At least I was no longer cold: I had to switch to a short-sleeved shirt (silver foil skull & crossbones) after the first round.

Let’s take a look at the stats:
3 snooze alarms
3 in-and-out of bed
1 crying jag
2 pajama outfits
100 squats
100 situps
50 pushups (plus 5 bonus diamond pushups and 10 attempts at one-handed)
1 best-in-class husband
1 annoying-but-cute cat

A day could start worse.

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9 Responses to “The Consolation Prize Workout”

  1. David Humphreys says:

    It's all in the story.

    I might tell that like this, "This morning, when our alarm went off at 6:20a, and we heard the freezing rain falling outside, my badass wife, instead of flopping back into bed (like I did), got up and did a WoD in our spare bedroom."

    Pushups in the spare bedroom are totally action hero. The only thing that would be more action hero is if you had done pullups in a snow storm, right after target practice.

  2. Ames says:

    I like this post. Way to go girl!

  3. Aaron and Marcy says:

    My fiance has been my best supporter this week too. I have been feeling discouraged from lack of progress with my chin-ups and push-ups – (I'm totally suffering from comparison syndrome; "I used to be able to…") – and not only has he been doing my workouts with me, but he keeps telling me how much he believes I'll get my muscles back. I don't know if I could stick to it without his encouragement but it will be totally worth all the work when I'm hiking up the sleeping giant in Kauai in 8 1/2 weeks for our honeymoon!

    Dave seems like a great guy to have on your side.

  4. meghan says:

    I just…need, like, a shot of your resolve. Honestly. 6am in winter is a dark, unforgiving time to have the alarm going off.

  5. georgia says:

    I think Dave could make millions teaching other men how to make their wives feel special and loved.

  6. Mer says:

    That made my day! How sweet. :D

  7. Fontaine says:

    Way to go. I've decided to stop lurking. I start my fitness net ramblings everyday with a peek at your blog. I'm a huge fan.

  8. Melissa 'Melicious' Joulwan says:

    Thanks, everyone, for your supportive comments, as always. Yes, Dave is probably the best human on the planet.

    Fontaine, welcome! And thank you!

  9. David Humphreys says:

    Y'all are a bunch of sweet talkers.

    I read recently that a good marriage is where both people think they got the best of it.

    I definitely think I got the best of this relationship.

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