Giving Fear a Workout

Fear and I have been inseparable companions since my doctor recommended I have an ultrasound of my thyroid on November 6. That’s 24 days and nights of worrying. I know that one of things that Dave likes about me — and, frankly, that I like about myself — is that I usually lead with my chin. I might be a big baby on the inside, but I pretend to be brave and act accordingly and most of the... read more

Zone-friendly Yogurt

Chocolate peanut butter ice cream, macaroni & cheese, and whipped cream are notable exceptions, but truth be told, I’m not really a fan of mushy food. I like my meat well done. When I eat fried food, I want it extra crispy with those sharp, crunchy edges that might lacerate the inside of your mouth if you don’t bite just right. Extra dark toast. Well-charred bacon. I like food that might... read more

A Real Pain in the Neck

Yeah, that joke never gets old. I took my Frankenneck to the doctor for a follow-up today and got great news. The pathology report was back, and I definitely, absolutely, positively do not have thyroid cancer. Which means I get to keep the piece of thyroid they left me AND I don’t have to undergo radiation. When my neck is healed, this particular adventure will be over. I’m so relieved. The doc... read more

Blame the Amoxicillin?

Last night, I got caught up watching the first of the two-part finale of Dancing with the Stars and forgot to take my evening dose of the antibiotic Amoxicillin. I was watching the show and laughing and bending and not needing to lie down… I even made myself a snack. In short, I was feeling pretty good and more like my old self. I didn’t realize ’til the show was over that I missed my... read more

The Reasons I’m a Bad Patient

Poor Dave! Y’all should be sending him good wishes instead of me… yesterday he asked me if I was going for my “all-time high grouchy award.” Why, yes! Yes, I am. 1. I resent that my medication makes me woozy. 2. I don’t want to take another nap. 3. I hate to ask for help. 4. If the sheets are not perfectly smooth, I can’t sleep. 5. I’m impatient. 6. I keep running... read more

In My Own Bed

I’m back home, in my leopard robe, tucked in bed with lots of movies, my prescriptions, and my new stuffed friend “Bash,” a cute little lamb Carla brought to the hospital on Wednesday night. I’m realizing now that I had two visitors — Carla and Mamie — but it seems like a hazy dream. Yay, vicodin. Dave made me mac + cheese last night, followed by chocolate peanut butter... read more

She’s good!

This is Dave, guest-blogging. Mel’s out of surgery, and doing fine. The doctor tells me it was the best possible outcome: no cancer, and she still has part of her thyroid. I’m quite relieved. And now, the overnight stay. Like the lyric goes, “A man gets mighty thirsty, chasing you around.” read more

This is a really crappy hotel.

I’m waiting to go into surgery, and the doctors are running late, so I thought I’d share my list of complaints about the experience so far. I’m hungry. (Dave is tired of hearing me say that.) I had to take off my nice, soft squishy socks and put on olive green hospital socks. The hospital gown is big enough to wrap around me at least three times, but somehow, is still not big enough to... read more

Mushy Food, Crappy Movies, and Jane Eyre

Since I’m probably going to have a sore throat for a few days, I’ve made my list of mushy food requests, along with junk food movies to help me during my recovery. My food list: reduced-fat macaroni & cheese chicken soup with stars Chef Boyardee canned ravioli (I know! So gross, so good.) butternut squash soup Mexican lentil soup chocolate peanut butter ice cream chocolate pudding My... read more

I Was Gonna Say "Yay!"…

… but instead, I’ll say “meh.” According to news reports, “meh” is officially a word. We should rejoice… except that I think this particular addition to the lexicon requires us to shrug our shoulders in a fashion that conveys almost caring. “Meh,” a word which indicates a lack of interest or enthusiasm, became the latest addition to the Collins English... read more

Monday Bootcamp & Thyroid Surgery Fun Facts

Bootcamp was awesome this morning, but I continue to be distracted by thoughts of my surgery on Wednesday. Intellectually, I know there’s no cause for alarm; this is just a small bump in the road. But emotionally, I want to be under a snuggly blanket with my Teddy, a seriously bedraggled stuffed panda my dad gave me on my first Christmas. Monday Bootcamp 4 rounds jump rope, 1 minute 50 Russian... read more

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